Statue of Stupidity

Drenched in Bombay monsoon I reached home. I sneezed thrice. Soon to notice that I was sick and getting sicker by hour. The day later I was sitting in front of Dr Lombar. He was watching my X ray. Deep in thought, changing vision between me and the X ray. For a movement I thought, I should have got an expensive colored X ray. You know, nothing is worth your life. Then he looked suspiciously at the X ray. He seemed to be thinking 'How I am still living' or 'how does he make a living out me?

Deciding the plan of action he prescribed medicines. I looked at the inscription and quipped. ‘That’s all!’. My sarcasm was misunderstood. Dr Lombar said ‘Yes! Two medicines for curing your pneumonia and others may be… because they do not harm you.’


I started eating medicines; all through out the day. In between when ever I got time I ate food. With in two days I smelled like a pharmacy. Strong and pungent I was feeling like a pesticide or insecticide or disinfectant or something worse.

I found mosquitoes dead in hundreds and rats running out of the house. There was really some thing weird happening.



Soon I found that mosquitoes form nearby localities started vanishing. Wow! I turned into a mosquito repellent. Local Corporator wanted to felicitate me by erecting me a as statue at the main junction. The local groups immediately asked for bonfides. ‘Whose statue is this?’ The corporator said ’ Don’t worry, you don’t need to maintain the statue.’ The locals were not happy. ‘We demand to know the name. How else you think we will garland or deface it?’



The debate continued. Finally the corporator felt that I should be moved out of the city. Finally I was erected on the Butcher Island on the Mumbai harbor. Sensing my qualities, Mayor Nana Chudasama entered the fray and stated a movement called ‘Butcher Mumbai’- a movement to support an eco friendly, bio- repellent to make Mumbai Clean and healthy.


My fame spread far and wide. My effect was seen as far as Karachi. Karachi was becoming mosquito free. People slept for those additional hours in peace. But, the blame was they were getting late for their morning arzaan. President Musharaff considered this very unIslamic and launched a protest with UN. He feared that India conducted a silent nuclear explosion causing death to mosquitoes. The controversy was building. The year turned.


Monsoon started. I was drenched. Grass was growing under my feet. Butterflies were fluttering around my face. Nan Chudasama cried ‘Hey! The statue is no more effective!’ Another controversy! The Government said there are too many waste things around the coast occupying space. Bombay can not afford another Vikrant. I felt sad.


My nose was running. I sneezed thrice. I shouted’ Wait I am back in two days!!”